In Part 6 of The Ten Components of “The Thinking Environment” we look at FEELINGS!
I’m sure you will agree with me that feelings are a vital part of our own well-being and driving force behind how we see and react to to one another and the world.
Component Six – Feelings
“Unexpressed feelings can inhibit good thinking.”
“Allowing sufficient emotional release to restore thinking.”
I feel that emotion is a subjective reaction to an experience. It is not a reality, only our perception of reality, related to the perceived impact it has on us based from our life experiences.
In this way, the same experience can evoke a different feeling in different people and of different magnitudes. I think this variation in the human experience of feelings is what makes us so fearful of where someone’s mind-set is when they have unexpressed feelings.
I am an emotional person, reacting to situations (generally) more than others.
Knowing this, I tend to hide my true emotions which can shut me down. This in turn results in me not being fully present in a meeting and feeling disconnected.
My behaviour then indicates to others in the meeting that something is not quite right with me, yet they don’t know what it is.
This becomes a cycle not only affecting me and my thinking, but affecting other people’s level of being present and focused in a meeting as well.
Knowing that one can use this Component to at least enlighten others that something is amiss (keeping to a respectful amount of detail and not oversharing) does put others at ease too, and for me – feels like a weight is off my shoulders and I don’t have to pretend anymore, or use the “I am fine” line, so often used to hide feelings.
Then I can, and do engage more fully.
I feel one needs to embrace that feelings are a reaction to an event, and we all experience these reactions differently.
Understanding this helps us to help others open up and express where they are without judgment in a calm and welcoming way.
This will also bear homage to the first six Components of:
Firstly and secondly, Attention and Encouragement– by acknowledging they might have feelings that are hindering them and inviting them to express what they need to, to continue;
Thirdly, Equality – allowing them the freedom to express themselves, even if you don’t share the feelings or haven’t had the same experience; thirdly,
Fourth, Ease – being created simply by the process of them expressing their feelings and re-igniting their thinking;
And lastly, Appreciation – by re-enforcing that their experience matters, which in turn means that they matter.
For more information on this remarkable workshop and make sure to get your free copy of The Thinking Environment™ Overview.